Embarrassed about wanting to fight

I want to fight amateur. I have been self teaching and self training for a very long time (on and off 20+ years), but only joined a gym and did my first class last month. We mostly do pad work, but I mostly just want to spar and eventually fight amateur. I’m old (almost 40) and afaik don’t have much time left to fight, but I want to do it win, lose, or draw.

I just find myself shy about wanting to ask my gym to fight, seeing as 1) I’ve only been there a month, and 2) winning is not important to me. I guess I’m just looking to see how common my situation is, and if it is acceptable to ask my gym to fight. Like being asked to be fed to the wolves.

Though to be clear, I’m not asking to fight like tomorrow or something, but preferably within a years time. Should I make my intentions clear now, or just keep doing classes and wait until I’ve been at the gym longer?

Any and all input is appreciated. Thanks.